License Agreement

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Effective as of October 10, 2023
Revision issued on October 3, 2023

Disclaimer

This License Agreement is 100% satirical in nature and contains languages that may offend some people. Do not take it seriously, please

Hello, and thanks for your interest in initiating a friendship with DigitalAzure (“DigitalAzure”, “Digi”, “me”, “my”, or “I”). This License Agreement is a legally binding contract between you and DigitalAzure regarding your initiated friendship with DigitalAzure.

Please read the following terms carefully. By accepting DigitalAzure's friend request or sending DigitalAzure a friend request on any platform, you hereby agree to be bound by the DigitalAzure License Agreement. If you do not agree to these terms, you may not initiate a friendship with DigitalAzure.

1. Overview

Alright, no bullshitting here. Let's get rooiiiiiiiiggggghhtttttt INTO THE NEWS- I mean, LICENSE AGREEMENT BASICS! Because what else are you here for? Actually reading the entirety of this License Agreement? Hahahahahaha, no.

  1. This is a License Agreement, you bound to it.
  2. You don't need to know anything else
  3. You'll never read it anyways
  4. But you'll never know, you're still fucked anyways.
  5. This is still not a serious License Agreement, but you MUST read it. You HAVE to do it, no matter what. Everyone does.
  6. Literally yeah.
  7. All legends die in making.
  8. https://twitter.com/iiWzS/status/1138223002208878592
  9. a

2. Basic Morals

I know my shit about basic morals, okay? You're not being as conservative enough to notice the simplest of things about this very important topic that we must protect at all costs.

  1. I reserve my own rights to find whatever is deemed moral or immoral.
  2. You're not my goddamn dad/mom.
  3. You better be bound to my inconsistent decisions.
  4. Just mind your fucking business, will you?
  5. For fucks sake man.

3. Human Rights

You better understand very well that I have my own『ＳＴＡＮＤ(スタンド)』regarding my political and non-political view on Human Rights. My view on Human Rights are as follows:

  1. You're my bitch.
  2. Forever,
  3. And ever.
  4. Now go back to work on my Minecraft server, you free labor.
  5. mc.digitalazure.net

4. Intrusion of DigitalAzure's Social Bubble

You bitch-ass cowards should never ever step on my goddamn social bubble, should yo' ass dare to step foot into it, I will pop your goddamn arse without any hesitation at all. Regardless of your race, religion, country of origin, and more, because equality is everything. You agree to not get directly involved in these following communities:

  1. Xontavs
  2. Xontav
  3. An Xontavianings
  4. Finding DigitalAzure
  5. #FreeLilA
  6. #FreeClo0ne
  7. Happy Shiny New Years
  8. Ransom
  9. Lakewood (Pre-2018)

Any of you pendejo's caught fucking around in these gangs without proper written permission from all parties, I'll pop yo' ass off motherfucker.

5. Redacted

Article 5 is redacted for the sake of the reader's mental health and well-being.

6. Non-disclosure Agreements

By accepting this License Agreement, you agree to not disclose anything mentioned in the terms below:

  1. You shall never tell the public that there are hidden fees within my works.
  2. You will work for free.
  3. I expect everything given to me 100% free without any catch.
  4. I will strangle iWzS to death with my pillow.
  5. You will give me money through ROBLOX's Robux.
  6. You will give me games on the Steam distribution platform.
  7. I want puncaiks since 2014.
  8. Lyza is trying to make me to take it to the next step, send help.
  9. She trying to push it on me, literally.

7. Mandatory Requirements and Actions

By accepting this License Agreement, you agree to face these mandatory requirements and actions should they be enforced upon you, even if it means against your will:

  1. You will be greeted when noticed to be online
  2. You will talk to me when a conversation is initiated by me.
  3. You will send me an invite to whatever VRChat instance you happen to be in. I don't care if you're in private.
  4. You will give me money (five US Dollars at minimum)
  5. You may respond with something along the lines of “well that's stupid”, but you are wrong and you must accept that your initial assessment is incorrect. You HAVE to do it no matter what, everyone does.
  6. You must have at least one thousand tweets on https://www.twitter.com.
  7. You are naught to ask for Ezura's TV tiddies on VRChat.
  8. If Digi says stop, it means ＣＥＡＳＥ
  9. The worm is coming for you.
  10. You have to inquire Ezura's TV tiddies.
  11. You are required to have at least 8 centrifuged Beyblades.
  12. You must have had Internal truck combustion.
  13. You have to accept Number 12 as intended.
  14. You literally do it, everyone has to.
  15. Buy kurger bing loot fettuce.
  16. The last thing you want in your foot fungus is someone's burger.
  17. You are must feeding the bungus the furger.
  18. You must respect Mein Furger, no matter what.
  19. You must enjoy listening to a specific British apocalyptic rave music set to 120 BPM with audible “pips” on every second. Along with kicks, bass, and big drums to punch your face every morning.
  20. You must enjoy consuming crackers with milk, salted butter, and chili.
  21. You must give DigitalAzure all your safe-for-work memes from PornHub.
  22. You must convince Michael Jordan to collaborate with the Xontavs.
  23. You must ask (REDACTED).
  24. You must acquire Ezura's TV tiddies in VRChat through the International Association of Tit Milk (IATM), as Ezura's manager is a certified ambassador for them for North America and other primarily English-speaking regions.
  25. You must contribute to the funding of Xontavs Cares Foundation.
  26. You must be 18 from KY.
  27. You must watch a lot of YouTube and play a lot of games.
  28. You must be new to the PC gaming community.
  29. “must you receive request to create the teev tidie!!”.
  30. I must witness your co-ordinates.
  31. You must obtain all the roblock content.
  32. You must consume tostito Cookie without hesitation.
  33. You MUST donate or contribute to the International Association of Tit Milk by following @chisnk and @chisank on twitter.
  34. You are allowed to draw R34 version of Ezura's VRChat variant, other variants such as God Eater 3 is still a no-no. BDSM is not allowed, fuck you.
  35. You have to call a giant blue transformer a “bumblebee” at 2am, no matter what. Gundam also counts.
  36. You have to prevent clxne from causing yet another tsunami full of sewage waters on any city in Cities Skylines.
  37. Ezura's tiddie milk is specifically reserved for everyone in the “Digital's Grid” Discord server, and if you are a member of the server, you may have a share.
  38. You are bound to number 58.
  39. You are bound to number 58!
  40. Attachment file: SPOILER_b9haaib8ibwa1.png (Please consult to DigitalAzure for further information regarding this file)
  41. You must have owned at least one piss drawer.
  42. You MUST jerk off silently.
  43. You may not do it now, there are V-cards nearby.
  44. If you are no longer virgin, you will (by law) be ranked on the Official Xontavs as a "Founding Father".
  45. You have to spend more, unless otherwise.
  46. You have to see and follow where the lil weewee goes.
  47. You have to let everyone in, no matter what.
  48. You have to prevent Lil' A from being publicly executed in Uzbekistan.
  49. You have to make sure Digi takes the next step with Lyza.
  50. You have to make sure Number 49 has to take place in an Xontavs-approved wedding venue.
  51. You must consult to a Xontavs' Founding Fathers before planning the wedding event for Number 49.
  52. You MUST have 249 of everything.
  53. You have to make happy little autisms, not mistakes.
  54. You have to confront Chisank to buy DigitalAzure a new laptop.
  55. You have to mine specifically 249 diamonds, no more or less.
  56. You have to celebrate DigitalAzure's YouTube channel's anniversary with earrape royalty-free ukulele on April 3rd of every year.
  57. YOU HAVE TO BOUND TO NUMBER 58 GODDAMMIT.
  58. You will take part in a mandatory cult ritual of having your bones crushed into ashes as I give you my friendliest wholesome family-friendly hugging you've ever had in your entire goddamn life.
  59. Welcome to the family, son.
  60. You have to do it, no matter what.
  61. You must scream “eat-a-dick-key-must!” everytime anyone is about to eat, and it must be audible within a 25-meter radeus.
  62. You will donate me your oak saplings in Minecraft
  63. You will be the insurance for my Minecraft house of any Creeper-related incidents
  64. You will provide any kind of aid for number 63.
  65. At this point, you might just think that DigitalAzure is just way too addicted to ripples.
  66. Tonight Mania, __!
  67. You must admire #519DFF no matter what.
  68. You will deny any claims of “fraud receipts” and must evade from such topic when in any kind of conversation. Failure to comply will result in additional 存そん在ざい費ひ (Existence Fee) to your bills.
  69. Nice.
  70. You will be available 24 hours a day to make DigitalAzure a pancake, should he request for one at any given time.

8. Forbidden Actions

If you're caught doing these shits, you're fucked. Literally fucked. Like, omg-so-fucked fucked. So, don't doing into these followings:

  1. You will not include me in any form of livestream or recording without explicit permissions.
  2. You will not perform any kind of immoral, suggestive actions towards me. This also includes, but not limited to, teasing, flirting, and suggestive gestures.
  3. You will not take advantage of this friendship to use me for any kind of purposes, including, without limitation, the development, design, manufacture, or production of nuclear, missile, or chemical or biological weapons.
  4. You CANNOT trust white Caucasia cracker America doctor.
  5. You MUST not make grand parent cry. NO broken branch.
  6. You cannot let bn steal the recipe!
  7. You are forbidden from calling DigitalAzure, but not limited to, “cute” and “cutie”.
  8. You may not use DigitalAzure with life-critical or safety-critical systems, such as use in operation of medical equipment, automated transportation systems, autonomous vehicles, aircraft or air traffic control, nuclear facilities, manned spacecraft, or military use in connection with live combat. However, this restriction will not apply in the event of the occurrence (certified by the United States Centers for Disease Control or any successor body) of a widespread viral infection transmitted via bites or contact with bodily fluids that causes human corpses to reanimate and seek to consume living human flesh, blood, brain, or nerve tissue and is likely to result in the fall of organized civilization.

9. Termination

If you violate any of the terms in this License Agreement, literally fucking die and get fucked, nothing more or less. Just the die and get fucked okay? Thankies. ^^

10. Them worm

Them worm:

  1. The worm is inside of you're head.
  2. If you hear the worm inside of you're head, make sure to use the tactical spade to kill it..
  3. Only the tactical spade can kill the worm.
  4. If you have clinical wormicitis, then you should just kill you'reselves.
  5. Long fingernails can stop them worm.

11. Copyright and Piracy

Don't copy that Digi. You have to buy your own non-commercial license to use DigitalAzure. For commercial or enterprise licenses, please request an inquiry to Xontavs or WNN (through Xontavs Media Holdings Ltd.) and we'll respond to you as soon as 3-5 business days. You are not allowed to use DigitalAzure without any license.

12. Country-related Notes